PONDERING "FAT TRANSPLANTS" - is there a market? i think maybe there is.

The other day, micajah and a couple of his friends were over. he wanted some money. for "food" he said. The next morning i walked into the kitchen and sitting on my counter was this:

THIS is NOT what i consider to be "food." it is also not what i want to spend my precious few dollars on. (i would much rather save those for Lindor truffles, or Hersheys milk chocolate nuggets with almonds and toffee chips, or pie...you know, REAL food...food for champions!

I asked what it was for and he said, "mom, just wait. i'm going to put on at least 10 lbs. a week." i said, "so you are going to drink muscle milk, then go out and eat fast food every day and then go to the YMCA and workout, and gain 10 lbs.? every week. ummmm, yeah. righto. what you are going to do is GET FAT. like your mother.

he rolled his eyes at me and said, "you'll see. when i work out, the fast food will turn to muscle." it's been two weeks now. he has lost about 4 lbs. so far.

anyway, this got me thinking...which was not a good thing. i get something on my mind and i go deep...too deep my male family members say. But, i was thinking about how skinny people always want to be fat, while fat  people always want to skinny. and so, i had an epiphany!!! i could totally help out micajah, landon (my oldest son), christian (my second oldest son), all of their friends...and then hundreds of other people out there wanting some extra poundage to pack on.

I would make a Will first. for when i die. (i can't help anyone until i die, so that's a small problem for them, cuz i don't want to speed that process up) and then i would make a Living Will. in it, i would donate the usual organs that people donate if they become brain dead (my kids think this already applies to me) BUT, here is where the help would come in...i would also donate MY FAT!!! If a family member needed very large "girls", transplant mine. if they needed a ginourmous badonkadonk...i'm your answer to prayer. extra chin? got three. a mole on your face that acts like a beauty mark? i have hundreds to choose from. need flabby thighs, loaded with cellulite? have two. how about a jelly roll or two or three around your waist? i'm your go-to girl, errrr...corpse. and then, whatever was left after family took all they wanted, their friends and co-workers could stop by the hospital and peruse all the fat that is left. and take what they wanted to increase their girth, or add on the pounds!

my family thought this was another one of my dumb ideas. but i'm thinking there might be a market for it. why let perfectly good fat go to waste, (i'll be in Heaven by then, in my "perfect" body, and won't need it anymore) when there are so many people out there that would give anything to "gain weight?" i'm going to google FAT TRANSPLANTS. i'll let you know what i find.